Hard to explain

Life is truly a painful process leading to death.
I thought I have strengthened my mind and changed, but I didn't.
I'm in the loop of this tragedy.

the son of my host cried, he was told,
"You have to be patient, it doesn't work if you just cry every time."

I cried. It is meaningless as well.
Such a life.

I felt so sorry for being upset, I apologized.

現實就是真真切切的痛楚，
當你以為願望成真了，那只是打開地獄的一扇門
現實就是地獄，沒有甚麼比活著更痛苦的事了

我以為可以鍛鍊心智，但是我沒有想像中的強壯
我覺得我改變了，事實上並沒有，
還是10年前那個現在泥沼中的我，一次次的自我毀滅
毀滅後卻不會重生，只是再重複一次的悲劇

房東的小孩哭了，爸爸對他說:
不要什麼是都用哭的，你只能耐心等待。

我也哭了，但這是沒有用的。
這就是人生。